Trying to find different ways to kill off your victims is no easy matter for today’s crime writer. Readers demand variety. You can’t keep bumping off your victims by bashing them over the head with a brick or pushing them under a train novel after novel.
Writers might well be advised to write what they know about, but I’ve never murdered anyone – I’m an ex-convent school headmistress for goodness sake! Much as I disliked the odd colleague, child, parent or individual I came across in all my years as a teacher, I never actually contemplated doing them in! Killing takes research.
Even the apparently less complicated ways like strangling, smothering or stabbing are not so easy to accomplish as TV dramas would make out – so I’m told by experts. The human body is remarkably resistant and fights back so, unless your murderer is a trained assassin, beware gentle writer. I vividly recall a session on crime writing by Lesley Horton (if you haven’t read any of her police procedurals you’re missing a treat and each one is meticulously researched) where she pointed out that an unless an average healthy adult is restrained or heavily drugged, it is impossible for a single person to smother them. It takes two. Even if initially asleep, the victim will wake and fight back.
The Golden Age of crime writing in the 20s, 30s and 40s loved its poisons, but for today’s writer there are so many factors to consider. What access does your murderer have poisons? Many household objects may be labelled poisonous but how much is needed? How can it be administered? Does it taste or smell? How long does it take to work? Is death instant or take months?
The use of guns is a highly specialized area. The amount of research needed is so great that it’s not a method I’m likely to use again. In one of my books, a character does use an old wartime Luger pistol brought home by his father as a war memento. It was difficult enough finding out what kind of wound it would inflict at a range of a few feet and what the likely consequences might be. Even then, one of my readers demanded to know if I’d ever fired a pistol. I thought that was a little unfair as there was no direct description of the killing in the book only the finding of the body hours later so the amount of recoil my inexperienced killer felt was somewhat irrelevant. Although I marvel at the technical knowledge displayed by writers such as Zoe Sharp about guns and military hardware, it’s not something I shall ever be able to emulate. I don’t know the difference between a pistol and a revolver or the damage inflicted by hollow nose bullets as opposed to any other kind!
According to Lesley Horton, the safest way to murder anyone in a novel is to hit them over the head with a heavy object. Twice. The first time is to break the skull and the second to damage the brain!
I am not opposed to copious levels of research. It’s a part of novel writing that I enjoy very much. I do have my tame policeman to help with procedure, a doctor for all the various medical conditions I inflict on my poor characters and it was my ex-nurse Tai Chi students who helped me find a suitable drug – Ketamine – in my first Fiona Mason Mystery. I have made contact with a coroner’s officer, a fire chief and various other experts in the course of writing my novels but haven’t yet found a gun expert.
The killing methods of fictional murders will obviously vary not only by the background and expertise of the writer and their access to ‘experts’ in the field, but by the crime sub-genre in which they chose to write. Cosy crime will hardly have similar methods to those whose killers who lurk in the pages of Scandinavian Noir or even hardboiled thrillers. My Fiona Mason Mysteries each take place on a coach holiday in a different European country so it is unlikely that any passenger will pack a gun or lethal amount of strychnine into their case on the off chance that they come across someone they wish to do away with. My stand alone Psychological Suspense novels all have protagonists leading very ordinary lives, a College Principal; a teenage office worker; a teashop owner and a Human Resources Manager for an insurance company. The likelihood of them finding themselves mixed up with Mafia types, hardened Big Boss criminals and the like is pretty remote. So far I have tampered with a car; pushed someone off a platform under an express train; stabbed my victim with a letter opener; persuaded someone to let themselves over the side of a boat in shark-infested water after giving them a mind-bending drug and hitting someone over the head to name but a few.
I’ve just been reading about murder by defenestration. Now there’s an idea! One of Fiona’s villains would have no trouble pushing their victim out of a window from a top floor hotel room. Definitely one to store away for a future mystery.
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